Friday, March 4, 2011

OH...IF ONLY...

Are your days fulll of hurrying? Wow, mine are...seems like I just get up and zap...the day's over...so soon? Sunday, March 13th, we march forward; setting out clocks up an hour! Didn't we just fall back an hour in November...time goes backward and forward...hmmm. What did I do w/it...or what didn't I do w/it.

If I were to ask you what troubles you most in your life...right now, this particular time...what would your answer be? My answer is that I regret how I wasted time; I've been thinking about, "Oh, if only I had...".

H. G. Bohn wrote, "One of these days is none of these days". One of my 'major regrets' is shortchanging our four sons of precious quality time. Steven was 17 mos. old when Jeffrey was born...Jeffrey was 11 mos. old when Patrick was born...Patrick was 24 mos. old when Scott came along. Doing the math adds up to four boys in less than five years and yes...I had my hands full and was busy.

Being busy is no excuse because I still had hours/days for other things (I'm a multi-tasker)...I was selfish too much of the time. The boys matured and are wonderful, spiritual men...so I didn't fail as a mom. Still...if only.

Fast forward to an empty nest...those thirteen years of addiction...wasted years never to be reclaimed. I regret the stupors, the lies, the cheating...the shortchanging Michael...oh, if only.

Then, there were too many times I couldn't/wouldn't talk to those who cared about me...the times I refused to talk to God; the times I refused to help my wonderful friends...oh, if only.

Oh...if only. Oh...but wait; this is today, the here and now! Regrets can have a purpose...they serve as a reminder that I'm given opportunities to use those experiences/regrets to help someone else.

A popular past sit-com, Cheers said, "Time goes by so fast, people go in and out of our life; You must never miss the opportunity to tell these people how much they mean to you."

Guess I'm curious (so was Einstein) but I like to find out about people...people I run into on a regular basis, etc. But sometimes I neglect people I see on a regular basis...and that isn't good because you can unconsciously hurt some feelings. I'm doing my best and going out of my way to reach out and touch those as we go in and out w/each other.,,reaching out & touching is good.


Father, I allow myself to be insensitive to people; I'm sorry for that. I pray that I will be alert to every opportunity to let people know they are special to me. I know I am special to you and I thank you for your love. In Your Son's Name, Amen.

For me, no more 'Oh...if only'. How about you?

Balanced and Unafraid...

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